When we get upset, we become full of negative emotion. We don’t notice this emotion, but it’s there and it totally destroys our effectiveness. It keeps us from seeing clearly and it forces destructive behavior. It also destroys love and makes life very uncomfortable.
When this negative emotion is present, we are guaranteed to make our situation worse. Unfortunately, we don’t notice this emotion. All our focus is on our circumstances.
We focus on our circumstances because subconsciously, we perceive them as a treat. To avoid this perceived threat, we fight, resist, hang on, and withdraw. Almost anything we do in a state of upset sabotages our lives.
If you could be free of this negative emotion, you would see your situation clearly and could take effective action. You would also create an environment where solutions and opportunity show up.
If you are ever upset or in a difficult situation, restoring inner peace should be your top priority. The first step in accomplishing this is to separate the circumstances from the emotion. You do this by noticing their different locations.
The circumstances are outside of you. The emotion is inside of you. They are never connected in reality. They are only connected in our mind. When we connect the circumstances and the emotion, we lose our power. We give it to the circumstances. The moment you separate them, the circumstances lose power and you get your power back.
The next step is to get rid of the emotion. You do this by diving into it. Feel the hurt deliberately and purposefully. Feel it because you choose to. Reach in and pull it out.
Feel the hurt of the circumstances and the deeper hurt of feeling worthless, not worth loving, failure, or whatever your core issue is. If there aren’t any real tears, fake the tears. Faking the tears coupled with an exaggeration of the emotion is just as powerful as the real tears. Let the hurt come and let it go.
A good way to see how this works is to look at little children. When they get hurt, they cry. Then, when they get through crying, there is no more hurt. Little children are able to release their negative emotion because they feel their hurt willingly. When you feel your hurt willingly like a child, because you choose to, the hurt comes and goes. You restore both your peace and your effectiveness.
To learn more about how to release negative emotion and restore your effectiveness, attend our workshops, visit our bookstore, and schedule an appointment with Bill Ferguson.