Articles from June 2011

When you are full of fear, you become very ineffective. You lose your ability to see clearly and tend to make your situation worse. So how do you get rid of fear?

To answer this question, let’s look at the nature of fear. Fear is created by resisting a future event. For example, if I have a fear of losing someone, I am resisting the future event of possibly losing the person.

The more I resist losing the person, the bigger my fear. The bigger my fear, the more I feel threatened. The more I feel threatened, the more I hang on and push the person away. This is the nature of fear. Whatever you fear, you tend to create.
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Have you ever been verbally attacked by someone? It hurts and our natural reaction is to fight it, but this is the worst thing you can do.

Fighting what someone has to say doesn’t make the person’s upset go away. It gives it more power. The person gets more upset and blasts you even more. Then you get more upset and resist the other person even more. This quickly evolves into a cycle of conflict, where everyone gets hurt.

The key to avoiding this is simple. Listen. Instead of fighting what the person has to say, pull it out of the person. When you do this, the upset loses power.
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