Releasing emotion – A fast way to restore inner peace

When we get upset, all the focus is on our circumstances. Something happened and we don’t like it. Unfortunately, we are so focused on what happened outside of us, we don’t notice what is happening inside of us. We can’t see that we are full of negative emotion.

This emotion takes over. It destroys our ability to see clearly and forces destructive behavior. Instead of making decisions and taking action based on facts, our actions are determined by emotion. This destroys our inner peace, our effectiveness, and our happiness. Fortunately, it is possible to release this emotion.

The best way to see how to do this is to look at little children. They are masters at releasing negative emotion. When they get hurt, they cry and cry. Then, when they finish crying, there is no more hurt. They are able to release their emotion because they do something that we don’t notice. They feel their hurt willingly. This allows the hurt to come, run its course, and go.

To see this in your life, find a time when you were hurt. You cried and cried. Then, after you finished crying, you felt a wonderful freedom. This is a time when you felt your hurt willingly. Feeling the hurt willingly allows it to go. This is the key to releasing negative emotion.

“But I do feel my hurt and I cry, but it doesn’t go.” Yes, but feeling the hurt doesn’t equal healing it. It’s how you feel the hurt that determines whether it goes or stays. You can either feel your hurt willingly or unwillingly. When you feel it willingly like a child, it goes. When you feel it unwillingly, it turns into pain and stays.

More specifically, you can either feel your hurt as a victim of your circumstances or you can feel it deliberately, because you want to reach in and pull it out. When you feel your hurt as a victim, you can cry hours a day for months and have little or no healing. If you take the same hurt and feel it deliberately, because you choose to, you can have a major healing in minutes.

To see whether you are feeling your hurt as a victim or because you choose to, notice the direction of your focus. If your focus is on what happened, you are feeling it as a victim. If your focus is on the emotion and releasing it, you are feeling it at choice.

Several years ago I received a phone call saying that my mother had died. I was very close to my mom and when I learned that she was gone, I had lots of emotion. Fortunately, I knew that I had to get this hurt out of me. If I didn’t, I would have been in pain for a long time.

To release the hurt, I dove into it and let it take over. I fell to the floor and sobbed and sobbed. I felt the hurt willingly like a child. After about 30 minutes, there was a moment when the hurt stopped. It was all gone and I felt better after the release than I did before I got the call. I had a major healing.

The ability to release negative emotion is in all of us. Whenever you are in a state of fear or upset, take the following steps:

•   Notice that your circumstances are the way they are whether you like it or not. Notice how irrelevant your feelings are.

•   Notice that your circumstances are outside of you and that your upset is inside of you. They are not connected except in your mind. The moment you separate the emotion from your circumstances, your circumstances lose power.

•   Dive into the hurt and feeling it willingly like a child. Get it out of you. If there are no real tears, fake the tears. Find the emotion and exaggerate it. Put it there. This has the hurt go quickly.

•   Feel the hurt of your circumstances and the deeper hurt of feeling worthless, not good enough, not worth loving, failure or whatever your core issue is.

•   Restore your inner peace. Then look to see what needs to be done based on facts instead of emotion.

Once you learn how to release your negative emotion, you will have a tool that you will be able to use for the rest of your life. It’s one of the keys to creating a life that works.

If you want to learn more about how to resolve problem areas, heal your hurt, and create a great life, take our Mastering Life Course. If you want individual support, give me a call. I look forward to hearing from you.